I like to think of myself as introspective, but in reality I’m just a woman who thinks too much. However I know I’m not alone on this; I have a ready pool of friends who are just like me, who have very loud thoughts and internal monologues.
This week, I got together with two of my best friends, and the theme for the night was about going with one’s feelings without judgement and to just be, especially in the context of relationships. Fiona, who is always herself and often inappropriate, decanted some tips to Brenda and myself, who are fond of over-thinking and reading into every situation, before preempting the outcome without giving ourselves the chance to experience the moment for what it truly is. It is our way of taking control, and stems from a fear of the unknown. Sometimes, we are quick to write off people as being non-potentials, because we know that there’s no future, so why even try right? But it goes against our desire to want to try everything, because of our curiosity and interest in depth of experience.
Having gone through this affliction of overthinking herself, Fiona spent 6 years working on it before finally getting it. She was taught some coping mechanisms, but only shared one with us (oh c’mon, right?!). She advised that our first step could be to observe our thoughts instead of being quick to put labels to these emotions. Damn, we don’t have 6 years to get it. I’ll be 39, so I’ll need to work on this one, pronto. Fiona had better dispense more tips soon.
Going with the flow is one thing, and the last thing we were actively working on. This is clearly the next step and is all about completely letting go and trusting everything will be alright.
We are going to have to stop being worry warts!